Sunday, September 18, 2011

 So around my house, there’s all these seasons that are honored.  There’s deer season…like 3 different flavors of it.  Then turkey and duck and dove and squirrel and rabbit and Indian elephant and the list goes on.  And on.  And there’s a wardrobe, or costume or whatever, and a set of rules and some  equipment, and even a  license.  I do not deny my honey his beloved duck hunting.  He did, after all, love that before he loved me.  And almost as much, or so I tell myself….  Anyway, he can keep his seasons; I just think it’s time for me to have one, too, for what my passion is.  I’m just sayin'….

So, here’s proposing a season for myself and you other “widows.”  All of you stuck with the kids or finding yourself with idle time while your husband’s in the woods or on the lake or the river or the golf course.  Because it’s high time we had our own season, too.  Let me “disclaim” by saying that maybe there are those of you, ladies, that like to pack heat in the woods…so OK, then you get all the seasons you want.  

But what I choose to do with my season is look for junk.  I use this term endearingly.  What “junk” means to me is a good piece to transform into something new or re-sell or put in that perfect spot in my house.   And do I LOVE to sniff it out.   My sister and I refer to our junk quests as “gleaning.”  You know, like from the Bible, picking up the leftovers.  (Ruth 2:15)  You’ll find us at www.gleanings.co, by the way.

I can’t imagine that you, too, would not choose to spend your season in the same manner, as you would likely not find yourself reading this blog if not. But, whatever your pleasure…scrap booking or shopping for NOT junk, (you know, new stuff – with bar codes and all), or reading or exercising (really?), or sewing. The point is, you can do whatever it is that excites you during this dedicated period of time.  But since I invented it, I get to name it; and it will aptly be called Gleaning Season.   



Those of you who love junk just as much of me, I know, are glad to finally honor it with a season.  You’re welcome.  Here’s to Gleaning Season.  And, just for credibility sake, I have decided to lay out some guidelines.  I may even develop a licensing system; stay tuned.  So here goes:

1)  Season Dates:  

Three months…..All the  -bers, except December, cause that’s reserved for sweet Baby Jesus. So, September, October, and November, I officially declare Gleaning Season.  And, bonus, it’s in the fall (my most favorite time of year ever), so along the way to your junking destination, please enjoy the foliage. 

2) Attire:

Comfortable shoes.

3) Equipment:

You’ll need a large cargo area.  Whatever you got available, preferably a trailer.  Maybe an eighteen-wheeler, depending.   You’ll prolly also want some baby wipes and hand sanitizer, what with all the dirt and cobwebs and port-a-potties, etc.   That’s about it.  And some cash and a good eye for good junk, but, again, you likely innately have that (lucky you) if you’re reading this. 

4)  Rules: 

     a.  Respect your fellow junkers. 

          Don’t you hate those wannabes who try to steal stuff right from under your nose or

          pick stuff out of your pile?  I mean, seriously.  Ask the junk owner with the fanny

          pack.  I told her I was starting a pile.

b.      Rise early…..early bird gets the worm and the early junker gets the goods.  I

      Recommend coffee, diet coke and donuts.  And some string cheese.



I also recommend that you go with your friend, or your sister (my personal preference), or your spouse.  But choose a partner who is also appreciative of good junk.  Otherwise, it’s robs your joy.  For real.  Or, if flying solo, at least call to share your terrific find with someone.  I’ve spent many a Friday afternoon gleaning solo, cell phone in one hand, junk, of course, in the other, asking questions like, “Sister, do you need an old green suitcase?”   Or you could choose to broadcast your great stories on a blog spot dedicated to this fine, fine art.  (For real….share your tales below….there’s a link for that  J) 

It’s also fun to ask the seller a question about the life of your find… Don’t you just love those stories ‘bout, “well that was in the attic at the house where I grew up and my brother and I used to………”  (Insert funny anecdote here). 



So there it is girlies.  A season for us.  Well, I guess you boys can come too, if you truly appreciate and embrace the beauty that is gleaning. So this little bit’s for you….  If you do choose to come along, please refrain from such phrases as “what  %*#@  are you going to do with that?”  The non-compliance of this rule will result in your termination from further excursions during Gleaning Season. 

If you wish, you may also respectfully tag along for the purpose of :   

A)    Carrying the heavy stuff  

      and/or  

      B) Backing up the trailer.  That ima’ fill with junk.



YEEEEEHAWWWWW.  Nothing gets my blood pumping like the thought of any empty trailer andmiles of junk, there for the pickin’; or can get me out of bed so early – well at least not with a smile on my face.  Unless you’re my sweet baby boy, and that’s pushing it sometimes, too.   Just the thought of all that rust and dust makes my heart smile.  Just strolling through the piles of discarded good old stuff…...<sigh>   It often stirs a comforting feeling of nostalgia within me.   I mean, it’s like coming home.  After all, they are - ya’ll are - my “peeps.”  Individuals congregated in the name of junk.  And where 2 or more are gathered, there is……well, not THE Spirit, but, I’ll grant you there’s a spirit.  If you know what I mean, then you know what I mean.  I love the fun of negotiation, too.  For example, “But if I buy all 14 bags of (old, glorious, colorful, vintage) buttons, then how much?”  I mean, we junkers could be economists, am I right?  But then again, maybe we don’t do much for the economy, since, you know, we would rather spend our money on old “junk” than shiny new stuff with those ugly barcodes.  Anyway, the jist of it is this.  We the people, the lovers of junk, are a dedicated group with a common goal, and we deserve a season.  And fall is it. Gleaning Season.

So here’s to you and the love of junk.  And it’s opening season, so get out there!!!!

Maybe next I will declare a national holiday……..

Happy gleaning, and thanks for reading!